Now I will be the first to admit I absolutely hate dentists and have the biggest fear ever for them. I will always put them off unless I absolutely have to go with an unbearable toothache. Ever since I can remember I’ve had this fear and then I’ve had some awful experiences which just made it worse. Whenever I go to the dentists, I start to shake and can’t stop myself until I come out and I am back home, and this happens even if it is only a check-up.
So last year while deciding it was time to conquer some of my fears this was another one of them. When I was around nine years old, I was out playing in a friends garden, who had one of those swing sets with the two swings and a swinging seesaw. I was about to get on one side of the seesaw when the friend of mine decided to start swinging on it, and that’s when I began to hate my teeth. The seesaw hit me straight in my mouth and spilled one of my front teeth in half. So off to the dentist it was for me, and they had to rebuild my front tooth. Ever since then it hasn’t been the same (naturally), but it sticks out of line from my other teeth. If it weren’t for that, I would like my teeth. But since that first build up it would seem to fall off, and I kept having to go back, I once had a dentist do it who I nearly punched (not on purpose) as a reaction to the anaesthetic and pain with it being in the front of my gum and me being only young it hurt, a lot. So my arm automatically just shot up towards the dentist who caused the pain and his assistant had to catch my arm.The next experience with that tooth and that built my fear was when a different dentist went to build it back up and dropped one of the tools into my hair, and then carried on with said tool in my mouth, I was traumatized. I went home and cried, and my mum complained, I haven’t ever seen the dentist since. I did finally have it built up where it eventually was strong and hasn’t fallen out since.
However since the age of 16 and being able to make my own appointments I didn’t until last year, and I was 22. So that’s 6years without seeing a dentist and ill admit I didn’t look after my teeth properly as I took a lot of bullying with my front tooth when I was younger, so I thought there was no hope and just abandoned them. Which now I wish I hadn’t, but I cant go back, so I just have to deal with it. This trip ended up with me having four teeth out and three fillings. 3 of those teeth which I had out confirmed my fear a lot more than I thought. I could feel everything she was doing ever pull every little bit of pressure which also meant I also had all the pain I shouldn’t feel, I felt it. Every little bit. The shaking I used to become worse, I was laid on the chair with tears streaming down my face, and there was nothing she could do for me she used so much anaesthetic that she could and yes she could have stopped, but I wanted it over and done with so I didn’t have to go through it again, so I never told her how much it did hurt. It took an hour to get two teeth out which should have took 15minutes each at most. And that was all my fault as I didn’t look after them as I should have.
But I was back again yesterday, and as scared and shaky as I was I came away happy. I found out that my teeth are all great at the minute, it’s my gums which need a little more care. But as long as I get them to a healthier and strong place my new dentist will finally look at my front too to put a crown on it and get it back into the place it should be and back in line. I may finally get to a place where I can smile and show my teeth a little. I may finally have more confidence with new people as right now I feel they are judging me by that tooth and the way it looks.
Have you ever had a bad experience with the dentists?
**This was a post from Little Yorkshire Girl